Tag: chandra wooten

Transparency

Chandra K

mychandrakAs you all know, I’m a transparent person. I believe that my experiences are meant to be shared at the appointed time to help someone else. I also believe that writing is not worth reading if it’s not inspiring or if there is nothing to be gained from it. So hopefully, something written here can be deemed worthy of remembering.

I went through a situation that I thought was impossible to overcome. I questioned my entire life and everyone in it. I became stagnant and ineffective in every way possible! I often hosted major pity parties that lasted for days at a time. I found myself being cynical and angry. I had become so consumed with being defensive, that I assumed everybody was an enemy and they could not be trusted. My whole life had become dedicated to correcting lies and addressing rumors. Simply put, I stayed there too long. My time should have never been wasted on such immaturity. I willingly surrendered to the captivity of others by allowing irrelevant opinions and assumptions to control my decisions.

I allowed the betrayal of a few people to change the person God created me to be. I lost focus of everything I once stood for because I was consumed with the thoughts and opinions of others concerning the life that God had entrusted me with. I knew that I was called to be bubbly and spread hope to those around me. However, circumstances made me think I was too “extra” because my desire was to be light to everyone. But that’s who I was. That’s who I am. Unapologetically positive! Unapologetically happy!

There is a meme floating around on social media that says “Everyone thought Noah was foolish until it started raining.” To me, this says, the weight of what I’m called to do is greater than the weight of the whispers around me. Noah knew who he was and what He was called to do in the Earth. So he did it! Unapologetically, he faced it head on and kept building!

So I say to you, be you! Be who you were created to be! Hurt is inevitable but it doesn’t have to be permanent. Allow yourself time to heal and get back to the purpose. Nobody can make the same impact that you were created to make. The world is waiting for your thumb print to be impressed into it!

One question: What are you waiting for? For people to like you? For people to accept you? For persecution to stop? For opposition to cease? Ok….it’ll never happen! Living for people is too expensive and it costs too much! So my next question is this: What weighs the most? The pressure of people or the pressure of purpose?

 

Move At Your Own Pace

Chandra K

IMG_0214Where did all of this pressure come from? It seems as if out of nowhere, there became this extreme weight to “become.” Well regardless as to what we think, “becoming” takes time. It’s truly a process. And being that it is a process, we shouldn’t rush it to finish prematurely. There is a reason for the timing and each step is necessary. There is more to being “great” than just being able to say it.

Could we feel rushed because of society? Maybe it’s the status changes and excitement of the constantly updating timelines of social media. What about becoming distracted by the success of mentors? Instead of being inspired by their endeavors, are you becoming envious that yours have not flourished yet? After all, they are your mentor for a reason. Or maybe it’s the common questions posed by family members such as, “You’re not married yet?” “You’re still going to school?” “You’re still living in an apartment?” “How long are you planning to wait to have children?”

No matter the reason, you can not allow this pressure to deter you. If you’re not careful, being driven by the pressures of life will cause jealousy to take root inside of your heart. This is mainly because your focus is now on what someone else has in comparison to what you feel you’re lacking. So you work in vain just to gain the life of someone else in order to feel “updated.” This shouldn’t be. Don’t conform and become another person because you feel behind a few steps. It’s okay. Move at your own pace. Who knows how miserable those people may be behind closed doors or even what they had to go through to get what they have. There is no age limit on success and there is no standard of when it should begin. Take your time. Grow and mature. This way, you’ll know how to keep what you’ve waited for, for so long.

 

Live Through It!

Chandra K

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The definition of live is simply to stay alive. Often times, we plan our own demise. We go through tough times and in the midst of it, instead of seeing ourselves living through it, we slowly die while we’re in it. The situation itself could not kill you but your mindset and your reaction to the situation is usually the deal breaker. Of course I am not speaking about dying a physical death but death to your dreams, your purpose, your future. It’s hard to have a positive outlook on going through something if you can not see yourself coming out of it. So what is the solution? I’m glad you asked. The solution is this, change your perspective and see yourself coming out alive! Just think about it. What if someone said “I want you to go through a house made of wood while it’s on fire and when you come out alive, you will be given $1 million.” Your task is to walk in the house through the front door, navigate through the house while its on fire, and come out through the back door. Sounds crazy right. But what if they added, you will be wearing a fireproof suit, a smoke mask, and the house is only a 350 sq ft. cottage home? Considering it under those circumstances, you would reconsider. Why? Because you could actually see yourself surviving that and coming out alive. Not only coming out alive, but coming out alive, $1 million richer!. Your perspective of the “burning house challenge” has changed. It’s the same thing with life. Of course you don’t have $1 million waiting on you at the end but you will come out alive with something. You’ll come out alive with a stronger will to live and hopefully a determined mindset to build from your experiences.

Just like the burning house scenario, we have been given everything we need to live and survive the flames of life. But instead of strapping up our boots and walking through the fire, we stand in the middle of the fire and subject ourselves to being burned. Sometimes we even settle in the fire and remove the very things that we have been given to protect us.

All I’m saying is, choose to live through it. Dying from it is a decision you don’t have to make. The fire can only consume you if you stand in too long. Don’t commit suicide by not choosing to live. You have way too many reasons to remain alive.

Start With Me; One Year Later

Chandra K

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This is more of an informal blog. More like a journal.

Today makes one year that my blog has been published. Looking back over the last 365 days, it hasn’t been easy. I know some people may say “You’re just writing a blog. It’s not a complex study.” This may be true. But the difficult part for me has been discipline. Some days I don’t feel like writing, some days what I write doesn’t make much sense to me, and some days I just can’t think of anything to write about. The main thing I’ve learned about myself during this journey is I have a long way to go with being disciplined but I have proven to myself that I can do it.

Over a year ago, I remember God telling me that I needed to start with myself. Meaning, before I could correct or encourage anyone else, I needed to do a self check to make sure I was taking my own advice. Not only that, but before I pointed out anyone else’s short comings, I needed to make sure I was upholding the standard myself. Even if we don’t admit it, self-checks don’t feel good. Mainly because, we like to feel as if we are okay. Not that we are perfect, but to us, our issues are minute, or very small. This was my mindset, as well as some of yours I’m sure. However, God wanted me to see that just as others are a work in progress, so am I! As I began to grasp this concept, not only did this help me to show love differently, it also helped me to see God differently. He showed me, me! No, I didn’t like it because there was so much in my life that was not pleasing to Him but He showed me so I could change it! I realized at that moment that God loved me so much that He gave me a mirror! And in this mirror, I had the ability to see only me! I couldn’t see through the mirror and look at others, I could only see me and my reflection! He loved me so much that instead of killing me, He gave me a tool to correct my flaws! As I was correcting my flaws, I found it easier to show compassion to those around me. I found it easier to practice patience and forgiveness because the mirror showed me areas that required the patience and forgiveness of others towards me! The mirror saved my life and it kept me from hurting others. As I stated, the use of a mirror for some may be difficult to accept and acknowledge but the mirror is much needed.

I am excited about my journey as a writer and I am anxious to see where this takes me! My mission and my purpose is to spread hope to all that I can reach. Hopefully within this past year, I’ve written something to encourage my readers and spread hope!

My prayer is that my writing never magnifies my struggles but my strength to overcome them, as well as the same for my readers.

 

 

Becoming A Better You

Chandra K

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There should always be a desire to be better. What good is it to go through hardships and struggles but not grow from them? Don’t go through in vain. Why would you want to go through a trial just to stay the same? Apply what you learned. Become a better you. Allow the old things to pass away so you can be better. When old things die, the opportunity for new and better is presented.

Even snakes become better. After they go through a period of being stretched, they shed and grow. Reason being, their skin can only stretch so far and once that point is reached, the snake comes out of the old and embraces the better. I know no one wants to be compared to a snake but there is something to learn here. Don’t be stretched just to stay in the same skin. Allow your stretching to bring you into a better place.

There are people who are waiting to watch you evolve into a better you and there is someone who needs the better you. The old you has officially reached maximum capacity. Its time to grow. Its time to become! Transformation and evolution should always take place in the life of the believer. Faith to faith should be goal. Constant growth indicates that you’re learning from life. This brings further confirmation to James 1:2-4 that states “My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.” This scripture clearly shows you that trials and tests are our opportunities to become a better us! As I stated before, don’t go through the struggle in vain. Grow through it! Become a better you!

What’s holding you back?

Chandra K

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Sometimes we have to just face the fact that they only thing that’s holding us back is us! What if I told you that you could really move forward if you wanted to and that thing you keep waiting on to happen may never happen? So will you keep waiting? Is it an apology you’re waiting on? Is it closure that you’re seeking? What’s holding you back from moving forward with your life?

We waste entirely too much time waiting on other people. We wait on someone to validate our ideas. We wait on someone to fund our dreams. We wait on someone to push us to the next level. We even wait on people to get on board with us before we decide to move. You can not afford to wait anymore! We don’t have time to waste. You don’t have time to worry about who doesn’t like you or who doesn’t support or who doesn’t wanna be a part. When you use your time for things like that, you lose time for the important stuff.

The solution is this: accept and move! Accept whatever happened and move forward towards what’s waiting for you. Don’t spend time focusing and pondering on the past, you don’t live there anymore! The future is much greater and it’s waiting for you! But you must decide to stop waiting and go for it. Catapult into it! Once you move yourself out of the way, you’ll realize how unstoppable you are! You’ll realize how awesome and amazing your dreams are! You’ll see how much potential you have! Stop waiting. No more holding back! Face forward like you have a chip on your shoulder and go for it!

Relief Valve

Chandra K

Question: Are you experiencing failure in an area in your life? Do you find yourself lashing out or exploding on people? How is your temper? How is your attitude? Last question, how is your character? Now ask yourself could my lashing out or exploding or bad attitude be an expression of my built up pressure?

According to Wikipedia, yes I said Wikipedia because I love this definition, a relief valve or pressure relief valve is a type of safety valve used to control or limit the pressure in a system; pressure might otherwise build up and create a process upset, instrument or equipment failure, or fire. Pretty much self explanatory so we can cut straight to the point.

We all know what happens when pressure builds up and has no way of releasing. It eventually turns into some sort of disaster. Okay, as a person, we may not have pipes that will burst or body parts that will pop off but we do have actions that will express our pressure! We also have organs and fluid levels that will be affected by our pressure. Based on the definition, pressure could cause a process upset, failures, or fire! In short, WE CAN NOT AFFORD TO HAVE A PROCESS UPSET. Look, the process is already tough enough by itself. Don’t add unnecessary stress to it. You must find a valve and quick! You were not meant to carry that level of pressure and you do not have o subject yourself to it. Don’t upset your process by holding on to the unnecessary!

Find a relief valve and utilize it! You do not have time for the upset or the malfunction. There has already been too much time wasted and moving forward is our only option at this point. Have you ever slammed your finger in the door? As time goes on, that finger builds up pressure and my grandmother told me to take a needle and put a small pinhole in my finger. Once I did, some of the pressure was released and my finger felt better. Sticking my finger with the needle was uncomfortable but in the end I could tell the difference. So by any means necessary, you have to keep moving. Push the button, pull the lever, unscrew the top, puncture the surface, do whatever it takes! But you MUST release the pressure before you explode. At this point, exploding would cause you to lose time, cause regrets, and damage relationships. This can not happen. Think about it. Would you rather cause a delay or simply release it and keep moving? Everybody’s valve is different. Some people use prayer, some use music, some people may write, and some people may express theirs verbally. No matter what, find you a relief valve before you cause a process upset! Pair your valve with prayer and release it!

New Years Eve 2017

Chandra K

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This year I started in January by asking God to “start with me.” I asked Him to help me to see me and work on myself. I asked Him to help me to stay in my own lane and be my own person in Him. I’ve always been independent but I didn’t know how to ride solo. I’ve always had friends because I’ve always been friendly. But this year I had to learn how to walk alone. I had to learn how to love myself all over again. He showed me how to walk in strength in the midst of chaos. He also showed me how to always hold my head up, as I have nothing to be ashamed of! He’s greater within me! So, I’ve developed a thick skin this year that some people have mistaken to be nonchalant. I just realized that people’s perception of me does not equal my reality. I know my reality and I know who He has created me to be. It’s been long and lonely. The survival has not been easy but I’m determined to keep pushing. I still have more growing to do. My desire is to intentionally right all of my wrongs. I’ve shedded some dead skin as well as dropped a lot of dead weight. I didn’t wait until 01.01.2018 to decide to change. I embraced my transformation along the journey. So as the clock strikes 12, there will be no resolution, just a continuation of the changes that He has begun in my life. And if I know nothing else, I know that He that hath begun a good work in ME will be faithful to complete it!

What’s your evaluation for 2017?

Happy New Year from Chandra K.

The What. The When. The Why.

Chandra K

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As humans, we depend on a few things to make our daily decisions. We usually depend on the what, the when, and the why. We wake up everyday and get started based on what we have to accomplish, when it needs to be accomplished, and why it has to be accomplished. These things tend to push us to progress. When all three questions are answered, we feel secure in handling our business and doing what needs to be done. One thing I’ve noticed is that when we don’t have the answers to the what, when, and why, we tend to procrastinate or prioritize it much lower on our to-do list. Have you ever been in an uncomfortable situation and maybe you felt like you didn’t know what was going on?  I have. I don’t like uncertainty and I hate to not know what’s coming next in my life. When I can’t answer the questions of why am I supposed to do this and what happened to change that and when will this take place, I tend to back off and not want to do anything because I can’t find reasoning. We find security in reasoning. Once we find out the reasons, we can operate effectively with confidence. But the question is what happens when you don’t know the reason? What happens when the why is not answered? Do you tend to slow down? Or do you do like me and just stop?

As believers, we are called to perform and continue no matter if we never know the what, the when, or the why because we are SUPPOSED to walk by faith at all times. Am I saying that information is not important? Of course not! The Bible tells us that we are supposed to seek an understanding in all of our seeking. I am simply saying that sometimes we won’t know the why. Sometimes we won’t understand the what. And many times we will not know the when. All we know is that our beliefs and our actions should always be based on faith. Especially in the moments when those questions are not answered!

In other words, blessed are those who continue to walk, continue to sow, continue to remain faithful, and continue to push, before you find out the why. I say this all the time, the situation doesn’t feel good. And the one thing we all would like to know is, “when will it end? When will it get better? Why am I going through this? What have I done wrong?” Just remember blessed are those who believe without seeing!

We know that no matter how dark and lonely the road is, He promised to ne a light unto our pathway! So, continue to walk, even when you can’t see because the steps of the righteous are ordered by the Lord!

Trust the Plan

Chandra K

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Not too long ago, my mother and I attended an event together. We had to park down the road from the event center and walk to the destination. The walk was very long; it was raining, and extremely cold. Due to the conditions of the weather, we decided to walk faster to get to a warm place. While walking fast, I noticed that the shoes I was wearing made it difficult to keep up with my mother. She had on flat boots and I had on heels. Due to the weather conditions, the sidewalks and pathways were both muddy and slippery. So a few times, my mother had to slow down and give me a chance to catch up because I couldn’t walk as fast as she could. However, we finally made it to our destination. We sat down and got comfortable. We warmed up as we were enjoying the event. As it came closer to the end, my mother told me she was ready to go because she wanted to beat the crowd. I wanted to stay in the event because it was cold and I was comfortable. I was not in a hurry to take that tedious walk so I wanted to stay where I was because it was comfortable.  Plus, we would be walking back with more people if we stayed until the end of the event and I figured that would make the walk less tedious. But because my mom was very adamant, I said ok. I decided to be obedient. So we left. Me and my mother we’re walking and a Good Samaritan drove up on a golf cart and offered to give us a ride so we wouldn’t have to take the long walk back in that weather. There were two other ladies that also decided to leave early and they wanted to ride to their vehicle as well. At first, my thoughts were, “He asked us, as in me and my mom, if we wanted a ride. Not them!” But I knew that wasn’t right so we all jumped on the cart and took off. While we were driving, the wind was so cold until it felt like it was cutting my face! I had tears in my eyes and my clothes were wet from the rain. I started to think, it may have been easier if we just walked. Then, I found out that we had to detour because the driver wanted to drop the other ladies off first! But mom and I stayed on the cart. Once we dropped them off, the driver cut back across the parking lot and took me and my mother as close as he could to our vehicle and dropped us off. Once I got off the cart, I realized that we had only been riding the card for maybe a minute and a half. But because of the wind pressure and the rain, it seemed much longer. Once we made it to the car, my mom kept saying how good God was and how He allowed the guy on the golf cart to ride up and give us a ride to the car. She kept saying how we could’ve still been walking in the cold rain and wind if we had chosen to stay. She kept declaring how blessed we were by leaving at the right time.

This made me think. His plan is always better. Sometimes we want to stay where it’s comfortable and even amongst other people to make the journey seem more entertaining and less lonely. But sometimes, He just wants us to be obedient and move at the appointed time. He has a golf cart waiting on you, just to make your journey less tedious. Another thing I noticed was that even with the detours, His way is still the best option. Did I want to drop those ladies off at their vehicle? I’m embarrassed to say but truthfully, no. I wanted him to take us straight to our vehicle because I was freezing and I didn’t want to sit through the detour. But because I chose to be obedient to my mother and leave with her, there was a better option waiting.

The revelation is this; no, we don’t always understand the plan of God. No, we don’t always understand His will for our life. But what we do know is that His plan contains the best option for not only our future but also for our today! Often times we subject ourselves to the long route and the more tedious journey simply because we refuse to be obedient and trust His plan for us. He made us! So of course He wants what’s best for us! All I had to do was ride it out, even with the wind, the rain, and the detours, and the rest was taken care of. His plan and his way are always better. Choose to trust Him and His plan for your life.